Remembering Ashley


Processing through emotions is a reality many of us have to face. Especially when it comes to grief. Losing a child has a special emotion. My heart aches, and sometimes it is difficult to process words. I have been praying through it…and Jesus always comforts me. As I was looking for something in my closet, I stumbled upon a small journal. This journal was my daughter, Ashley’s. It has been 4 1/2 years since she passed away. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about her. I have her picture around the house, and every week I tend to the precious plants I received from her funeral. I have notebooks and journals that I have read through before. However, this one, in particular, was difficult. She writes about me…her “loving Mom”. She writes how she’s beginning to like Now & Later candy, and caramel…and says “Mom loves these”. She writes about how she misses me and wished I could hug her and hold her, and tell her everything would be ok. She was away at college during this difficult time in her life. She was struggling….yet independent. As any mom or dad, we wish we could take away any hardship from our children. We look back and wonder if we could have done things differently. But we do the best we can, at the time. This world is hard and unkind in so many ways. We cannot protect our children from that reality. The things we can do is pray and help give them a solid faith foundation. My Ashley had scripture and encouraging writings all throughout this journal. I know she was seeking the Father and praying for Jesus to help her. This brings such joy to my heart. Even though it may have been difficult to let her go from this earth…there is no greater gift, than that of the eternal life, she is living today.

Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. PHILIPPIANS 3:12-14

And this is the promise that He made to us; eternal life. 1 JOHN 2:25

God is with us.


© Layla Freeman 2018
Author of HOPE IN THE STRUGGLE and Layla’s Light 
All Rights Reserved 
P.O. Box 669 Claremore, OK 74018
Facebook – Layla’s Light
Twitter – @laylaslight

Layla’s Devotional Book available for purchase at the following: 

Hope in the Struggle – $9.95 

AMAZON – Hope In the Struggle –

Another Chapter Bookstore – 9455 N Owasso Expressway, Owasso, OK 74055  (918) 609-5946

Stonebrook Day Spa– 1875 N Old Hwy 66 A, Catoosa, OK 74015 (918) 379-6838

Cozy Cottage Store – 518 W Will Rogers Blvd, Claremore, OK 74017  (918) 283-2232

She Brews Coffee Houses – Claremore, OK  (Downtown & within The Vessel) 
Downtown – 414 West Will Rogers Boulevard
Claremore, OK 74017  (918) 923-6020
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Claremore, OK 74019 (918) 965-1121

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