Honest Grief

grief_amp_healing_

Emotions overwhelm me today. No particular reason, just the raw reality of grief. There is no ‘normal cycle’ of healing from great loss. There are no warning signs when the emptiness is going to punch you in the gut. When we get down to it; the truth of grief is very painful. As a Christian, we have the promises of God and hope of eternal life. We know our loved ones have what we ultimately live for…eternity in Heaven. I am so thankful for the comfort I find in those promises. Without God; I would be lost. So, today…I will allow my human spirit to grieve the loss of my beautiful daughter Ashley and my precious Aunt Carolyn. I will remember their love, and allow my heart to feel. The anniversary of Ashley’s passing is Dec. 24th, Christmas Eve. It has been 3 1/2 years. My Aunt passed in January, 1 1/2 years ago. Even though time continues on, the pain of such loss does not go away. I will not numb the feelings I have today…I will face them, acknowledge them, and recognize that it’s OK to grieve. Too often the world pushes us to move on…get over the loss…and pretend we are OK.

I admit that I put on my mask on a daily basis. I have to. How do you get over losing a child? How do you forget about the people who impacted your life daily…who molded you into who you are? You don’t. You do the best you can…one day at a time.

I will never forget you Ashley. I will hold you close to my heart forever. You are in my mind every single day.

I will never forget you Aunt Carolyn. You are my second mother…my example…the one who led me to Christ.

Thank you Jesus, for allowing me to know the depth of this kind of love. I look forward to eternity in Heaven. Until then, I keep the faith and pursue the cross. I pray that sharing my grief with you today, will help you open your heart to Jesus…so you can allow Him to heal your pain as well. 

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. 2 TIMOTHY 1:7

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are – yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. HEBREWS 4:15-16

God is with us.

Layla

© Layla Freeman 2017
Author of HOPE IN THE STRUGGLE and Layla’s Light
All Rights Reserved
P.O. Box 669 Claremore, OK 74018
http://www.laylafreeman.com
laylaslight@cox.net
Facebook – Layla’s Light
Twitter – @laylaslight

Layla’s Devotional Book available for purchase at the following:

Hope in the Struggle – $9.95

Amazon-Hope In the Struggle – https://www.amazon.com/Layla-Freeman/e/B01M0VNTIM

Another Chapter Bookstore – 9455 N Owasso Expressway, Owasso, OK 74055

Cozy Cottage Store – 518 W Will Rogers Blvd, Claremore, OK 74017

She Brews Coffee Houses – Claremore, OK  (Downtown & within The Vessel)

Stonebrook Day Spa – 1875 N Old Hwy 66 A, Catoosa, OK 74015

 

Published by

Layla Freeman

Layla Freeman is a wife, mother, friend, and encourager to all. She is a passionate disciple of Jesus Christ. Layla is the C.E.O. and Founder of the Non-Profit outreach ministry called “Light of Hope”. www.lightofhopeinc.org. This is an outreach to help individuals and families who are struggling with addiction and life difficulties. On Christmas Eve 2013, Layla lost her oldest daughter Ashley. Ashley was only 23 years old. There is no greater pain than child loss. Layla attributes her ability to face each day, to the overwhelming love of Jesus, who carries her through. This very difficult journey has given Layla the desire to help those who are facing difficult times and to help people see the hope. Her love for helping others is the passion behind Light of Hope. Light of Hope non-profit ministry has a vast variety of services that encourage, educate, empower and bring change and hope to the lives of those who need restoration and new life. Layla was awarded the Non-Profit “Leading Lady” award of Rogers County in 2018. She was also voted #1 community volunteer “Best of Claremore” in both 2019 & 2020. On June 9, 2020, Layla Freeman was Inducted into the Prestigious Marquis Who’s Who Biographical National Registry, as well as recognized as an “Amazing Oklahoman” in October 2020. Additionally, her non-profit Light of Hope was awarded the "Non-Profit of the Year" in both 2019 & 2020 and is also the winner of the International 2020 Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) Community Drug Prevention Award. Layla is also an author. Her first book publication, HOPE IN THE STRUGGLE, offers hope in the midst of dark times. Layla is also the author of the encouragement blog “Layla’s Light,” found on Facebook or on her website, www.laylafreeman.com. She has been actively writing since 2001. Layla’s personal experience in the extreme difficulties of life gives her a deep understanding of brokenness. Therefore, Layla’s writing and passion behind her desire to help others is empowered by the truth of God’s unconditional love and forgiveness, and the hope we find in God’s promises. Layla is also a Business Owner/Vice President of Asset Industrial, Inc. She and her husband, Randall, work together providing services necessary for the oil refinery industry. She is also a respected Executive Committee Board Member, serving on the State Northeast Oklahoma Workforce Development Board. Layla is a public speaker and enjoys the opportunity to speak and present to groups, schools, churches, organizations, conferences, etc. She has a passion to bring awareness, education, and hope to our society. She believes that working together, and collaboration with others is the key to healthy families and stronger communities. In addition, Layla is a Stephen Minister, Congregational Care Minister, Lay Servant/Speaker, and a volunteer for the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation. (Layla has two daughters who face Type 1 Diabetes daily).

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